On Becoming Tech Savvy

A red light flashes inside a little box that is mounted above the whiteboard in my classroom—the wireless internet signal is down again.

The custodians changed the windows over the summer, ripped out all the wiring and damaged the sensors that control the weather monitoring station.

The cord to plug in the laptop is missing. The projector that connects to the laptop that allows the interactive Smart board lesson to launch was stolen.

The theft happened on the night of a Yankees World Series game so I suspect some jerk decided that watching sports on a big screen in his living room was more important than my middle school students. Now I am so paranoid that I even lock up the computer speakers and extension cords. It is no telling what might grow legs and walk out of this building.

I was a fine teacher before all these new finagled things came out, and one thing is for sure- I can rely on simple, easy and efficient time tested, technology-free methods to improve student achievement.

I really do want to extend and enhance best teaching practices with all these neat tools, but are they needed and necessary? The answer is no, and neither are the headaches. Plan B is now Plan A. I have some rubber bands and sand in the supply cabinet to model earthquake faults, an overhead projector for visual displays and good ol’ pen & paper. I am certain students will be engaged and eager to learn what I hope to teach them, with or without youtube, skype, real-time data and virtual fieldtrips.

Guess what now? The printer ink is out and it is going to take at least a week before the order will arrive at the school. There is no paper left in the school to make copies. Basics. Unavailable. Really? I wonder what it is going to be like after budget cuts?? Ugh.

The computers in the faculty lounge have not been maintained, or for that matter, even hooked up. The student computer lab door is locked and rarely available for use.

People keep telling me about a volt in the basement that is full of locked up resources. I am hopeful that a new projector, a cord, some wire, ink and paper will find there way back to my classroom some time soon.

In the meantime, I am becoming tech savvy. My plan is to use technology to eliminate the annoying, tedious teacher tasks that nearly drove me away from the profession in the first place. I will NEVER grade student work again. The computer will. Now this is a technology plan that will result in 100% teacher buy-in.

Really, Really White People

'They' came in a big, pale herd. Everyone of 'them' with ghost-like skin, light eyes, and a preppy look. They all had a way of speaking (along with really corny jokes) that made me want to smack them in the face for no other reason than that they just didn't get it. I found myself judging and scrutinizing every fiber of their Massachusetts, surburbanite beings. The whole package of them felt insulting.


It was as if their stuffiness reflected their close-mindedness. Enough to make a liberal-minded, urbanite want to gag. They wore these stupid uniforms-- you know, the jeans with a polo shirt and a baseball cap. The inflection in their voices and their body language was offensive. Lack of eye contact, poor posture, and unnecessary use of big words, I immediately recognized as a thin veil hiding fear, a lack of depth, and a self-righteousness that needed taken down a notch.

Or was it that at all?

Stereotypes.

Quick judgements.

Once upon a time, I was a white girl growing up in rural Michigan with very little exposure to cultural diversity-- at least before college. My experience outside of a really, really white community consisted of the black people I saw in the mall three times a year at the nearest city center 60 miles away, and the Korean daughter of the only foreign doctor in our town.

There was one multi-racial student in my high school-- Chris Jones had a black father from Flint. Every young girls parents feared that their daughter would date him. Oh, the shame! He had a great personality, was an awesome football player, and was my locker partner during my junior year. He died from a rare blood disease senior year, and then we were back to a bunch of white hicks and a losing football team.

We all need to take off our uniforms.

We all need to look below the surface.

Gossip Girls & Basketball: TGIF!

"Oh mY GOD! Look, it's Serena & Blair from Gossip Girls. That is my favorite show!!"

I took a group of students to the NY Academy of Medicine yesterday to do medical library research for their science projects and we saw an episode of The Gossip Girls being filmed. The Upper East Side at 103rd St was completely lined with Harrad's trucks all the way to the edge of Central Park. My students completely flipped out, but the girls were a bit disappointed that they didn't get to see Nate and his dreamy blue eyes.

I have to admit, I'm completely out of the loop when it comes to what is cool these days. I'm teaching sex education in health class right now and we are discussing all the changes that happen during adolescence. I mentioned laws regarding the age of consent for sexual activity and how being at parties with alcohol and older teenagers or college age students is a recipe for disaster. One student said, "That's what happened on Degrassi."

Is it just me or are the teen shows these days really edgy? I remember watching Nickelodeon and Saved by the Bell at their age. Green slime was about as graphic as it got. Well, at least the new teen shows are more realistic than the lame lifetime television specials I saw as a kid.

After school, we all let off some steam at the teacher vs. student basketball game! It was a double win for the teachers!Female teachers won against the girls team by 4 points, and the male teachers beat the boys team in the final minutes.

Teachers rule and students drool!

When it comes to basketball, I'm more of a Joe than a Pro. "Lagos, get on the court. You are the most athletic person here." No, not really. I planned to warm the bench. Really. Dribbling the ball while running and getting the ball in the hoop have always frustrated me, but somehow I managed to make four rebound shots and had three steals. "Mrs. L is really aggressive." "Good defense, Mrs. L " I chuckled. If they only knew... about the time I won the free throw contest in the third grade by shooting granny shots.

Small miracles happen all the time :) And trying your best is more important than winning.

Tinkerbell Strategy for Math

Don’t worry, kids. Just do your best. No pressure at all. Get a good night’s sleep. Eat a healthy breakfast. Believe in yourself with all your heart then you will get a very high score. That’s right, the Tinkerbell “I think I can” strategy is listed in the test prep tips right after “sit next to the smartest kid in the class and copy his or her paper.” Luckily, dictionaries are allowed during tomorrow’s state math exam. I’m just waiting for a student to ask how to write “2” in English. Scrap paper and calculators are not allowed. Bring your thinking caps and a number two pencil. Wait, wait. Don’t tell me. You forgot your pencil. And you forgot how to convert decimals to percents. Not a good day for memory lapse. I’d hate to see you become another statistic.


I doubt you will forget what I’m getting ready to tell you: An inferior test score on your 7th grade math exam sets into motion a sequence of events that will lead you into a less-than desirable high school, a less-than prestigious university, a work world where this early achievement gap translates into less wealth, the same unfair disadvantages for your underachieving mate and more of the same for your less-than privileged offspring. A high score could change your luck. It's a numbers game.

Lately, there has been a lot of “talk” at my school about why “best teaching practices” are not translating into “high student test scores.” We are a “model school” for math and reading, yet most of our students are not meeting the standards. At a recent teacher leader meeting, I gained a little insight into one glaring problem:

THE FORMULA. Schools under pressure to raise student achievement have to make trade-offs and decisions about which students they will invest time and energy.

Standardized tests are scored as follows: level 1(far below standards), level 2 (approaching standards), level 3(meeting standards) and level 4 (above standards). However, a student whose standardized test score moves from 1 to 2, or low 2 to high 2 does NOT help the school’s report card as much as raising a high 2 to 3, or 3 to 4. In the end, the level 1 and 2 kids are not “recruited” or “encouraged” to attend tutoring services and after-school programs like the higher level 2 and 3 students. It does not "pay" to help the kids who need the most support.

And here you have it, just like the middle-class is disappearing in the good ol’ US of A so are all the average students. The push is on to transform Susie-does-pretty-darn-good into Susan-does-super-duper-great. All the while, Rogelio-can’t-read and Mohammed-fails-math stand on the corner outside the school waiting for Susan to get out of her after-school enrichment program.

Maybe I should write a sequel to "Dumb and Dumber" called "Smarter and Smartest" where the characters outdo each other and themselves. This reminds me of Judith Warner's op-ed piece, "Glass Slippers, Old Hat," in Saturday's NY Times about a new trend in the "assortive mating" social science phenomenon that shows "alpha males are... marrying equally high-octane women." Such super-charged couples will likely pop out hybrid overachievers, either that or greater numbers of children with autism and bi-polar disorder, according to hypotheses from researchers at the University of Cambridge.

Promiscuous Girl

I once knew a man who sat on the toilet reading the dictionary. He picked out words & made a point of expanding his vocabulary. Some of the stuff he said (spoken with a fake accent) was annoying, ridiculous and often incorrectly used. Today, a female immigrant student with a real British accent reminded me of him. No exaggeration, she knocks off a novel per day & also spends extra time reading non-fiction so her word bank is quite extensive. Imagine how a little p-word mix up can turn plain simple English into a near cat fight.


Girl #1 (the reader): You are a very promiscuous girl.

Girl #2 looks confused because she doesn't know the meaning of the word.

Girl #3 (eavesdropping): Do you know what that means?

Girl #1: Promising.

Girl #3: No, it's sexual like in that song. "Wherever you are, I'm alone. It's you that I want. Promiscuous girl, you're teasing me. You know what I want and you got what I need."

Girl #2 (being talked about): Whoa!

Obviously upset, her head drops & she walks away from the other girls.

Girl #2: Mrs. L, what does promiscuous mean? Girl#1 called me that word.

Me: I think she means very precocious. Don't worry, it's a compliment. She's trying to tell you that you're really smart for your age.

Now a group of girls are in the background singing the promiscuous song & laughing about Girl #3 who is at this point completely devastated.

Cosmic Collisions

Class 714 is in big trouble. Apparently, while I was away, they just couldn't control themselves-- especially the boys who thought it was a good idea to "play fight" & touch each other in unusual ways. I've been known to make students walk down & back up three flights of stairs & form two perfect lines with everybody positioned like a soldier-- head straight, feet forward, shoulders back, & no leaning on the wall. And if anyone makes even the slightest sound and I mean even a whisper, we all walk back down the steps until this task is accomplished. Yes, I am aware of the fact that corporal punishment is illegal. No, this is a lesson on following instructions & how to walk in a school hallway. Teaching doesn't happen without these basic skills. Say what you wish, but first spend a day at an urban school.

I've been told that teachers shouldn't single kids out because it can scar them for life. Please! You better believe I point out negative behavior. "Ok class, we have to try this again because Kenny can't keep his MOUTH SHUT!" Then I glare at this daring pre-teen for what must seem like an eternity. In this moment of silence, each & ever face drops as if to say, "I can't believe Kenny did that. He's on his way to hell (aka, the worst possible high school in NYC)!" In the softest audible voice I can utter, the most horrible things roll from my lips in a very sweet chirpy tone. "This is not even a lesson plan. I'm trying to teach you about gravity so be quiet, form a line, and grow up! You're not getting away with anything in this class so get it right, right now!" I'm not trying to be mean, but guess what, this shock treatment get the desired response (i.e., refocused on being in school to learn) and reminds kids that there are consequences for their actions.  And, of course, my students get more positive reinforcement than anything else on most days.

I'm a midwest girl who started teaching six years ago in Crown Heights, Brooklyn & those kids learned science. I shocked the shit out of them. "Yo man, this white bitch is crazy. She so ghetto she eats chalk & made Jamel smell her armpit!" But everyday when they walked into science, big brown eyes were bulging & eager to find out what was goin' down. In the end, 98% passed the Biology regents exam.

So, there are bad days and then there are good days. I really love my students. Otherwise, I probably wouldn't be spending so much energy contemplating their actions & insisting on positive change. Recently, we took a trip to the planetary at the American Museum of Natural History. Unfortunately, we had to leave behind a troubled foursome from class 714. At the museum, students saw the space show 'Cosmic Collisions', studied in the Hall of Planet Earth & ate lunch in Central Park. Fifty little seventh grade angels packed into one subway car to make the great journey to Manhattan. When Kevin received his ticket stub, he noticed how much the trip cost. "Mrs. L, you paid $330 for us? It better be worth it!" After the space show, we were all in awe. What a wonderful lesson on gravity!

*AMNH class trip pictures coming soon. The picture above is from last years city-wide science fair. To the right is Mrs. O who is now carrying the the torch for the 8th grade Honors Program & was my student teacher. Students thought we were sisters because of our blonde hair & complementary personalities (good memories). Zhaona, Samoy, Kazi & Amanda presented data from controlled experiments & suggested possible solutions for environmental problems for an aquatic pest & an endangered plant species. Also pictured is Puff Daddy at the 8th grade prom.

Archimedes, Newton & Ben Franklin

Who came up with that anyway? What is left to be discovered? How are all great thinkers alike? Could you be the next great scientist? What does it take? Well, in class, we discussed Archimedes' moment of eureka & Newton's observations of apples. However, I embellished the stories quite a bit. According to my retelling, Archimedes bathed with his rubber ducky. Only a few kids pointed out the fact that they didn't have rubber duckies in Ancient Greece.


I asked if anyone could name a person who made past contributions to the betterment of life and science. I heard OVERWHELMINGLY, Benjamin Franklin!

"Yeah, he's on the hundred dollar bill!"

"The guy with the kite experiment. Can we do that?"

"The dude with electricity."

"I love that show Liberties Kids."

"Benjamin Franklin created a secret code for communication during the revolutionary war."

"Miss, who came up with invisible ink?"

"In National Treasure, they used Benjamin Franklin's glasses to read hidden messages."

I couldn't believe my ears! I was gearing up for a lesson on Newton's Laws & these kids were EXTREMELY interested in a topic related to the GRAPHIC NOVEL my husband has been working on for over a year. I gave them a quick lesson on some of the lesser-known facts about this witty, self-made man. They seemed shocked that their science teacher was giving such a thorough history lesson.
To find out more, check out the website.
http://www.thesonsoflibertybook.com/

We are too cool for school! Teachers really do have more fun. I thought about going easy on  my students for Halloween & not giving the goblins homework but quickly changed my mind when I realized they expected the day "off". A slacker attitude will bring out my whips every time.

Students wasted no time asking, "Do you have any candy? Are you going to tell us a scary story?" Most weren't even wearing costumes. As a matter of fact, "You need to learn and you don't need any candy. I'll tell you something scary. You're failing science. Get to work!"

Peace out.